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Oh religion. Such a lovely topic! So full of anger and judgement from any side you come from. This post is not about that, I’m not attacking anyone and I don’t particularly feel like being attacked. I’d simply like this post to highlight some inadequacies at a university who is striving to be more diverse and accepting of it.
Stellenbosch is Christian, let’s face it, and very religious. 21 of the 51 student societies identify as religious. Why is this important? Spirituality is important for emotional well-being. Yes? No. For many of us emotional well-being is important for emotional well-being.
My personal story is what inspired me to post, but it is difficult knowing how much of it to share here. I don’t really want people thinking about me but rather about how they might be treating others with the same views. I also like any who have the same views, if there are any on this platform, to feel less alone. It was also after I noticed that religion was not on the topic of discussion for the critical thinking MOJO week.*
I suppose the best place to start is with my views, so here they are. I am an atheist. I do not believe in a god and I think religion is a man-made structure whose purpose is to control people.
For 5 years this has been a struggle, so much so that for a while I convinced myself I was Christian (not my proudest moment). Besides that I can’t recall that I ever actually said to someone – “No thanks, I’m an atheist.” So I bowed my head when everyone prayed and kept my eyes open. I smiled and nodded when someone at lunch spoke of those godless people as a child would of the monster under their bed. I kept my dirty little secret and I felt ashamed. I blamed myself, what is wrong with me that I can’t believe?
Eventually I woke up, and I was angry. Mostly at myself. This is wrong, I shouldn’t have to hide who I am. Accepting diversity isn’t only about race, gender, sexual preference and religion. It is also about accepting a lack of religion.
Sure this could be our own fault. We aren’t outspoken enough, we accept defeat. However in the few times I have tried to discuss this with someone who has other beliefs they end up trying to convert me.
I guess there are just a few things I would like people to take into account:
- If the answer to “What church do you go to?” is “none”, instead of offering to help them find a church or saying how important church is, ask “why?”.
- Most atheists I know have grown up around Christianity and know the bible at least reasonably well. Throwing bible verses around isn’t going to change my opinion.
- My disagreement isn’t a challenge or offensive, isn’t pretty much saying my favourite flavour is strawberry while yours is chocolate.
- If you want to have a discussion, sure, but not while I’m in Bohemia on a Friday night please. Time and place…
Also please remember that being godless does not equal moral-less. I’m glad there’s so much support for the religious and spiritual. Let’s have some for the non- as well.
NOTES: Comic is by Don Addis – meant as an example of what not to do…
*I support MOJO week and think it’s a brilliant idea, will definitely be attending some of the talks!
7 comments on this post
frederickjlutz
(@frederickjlutz)onI really enjoyed your post. Having a lot of atheistic friends, I could relate to what you were saying, albeit in the context of a Christian being challenged by atheist. I think the tolerance and open mindedness you prescribe can go far in enhancing our emotional well-being. Also Bohemia, that helps too.
Nicole von St Ange
(@nicolevonstange)on“Also Bohemia, that helps too.”
Yes :) And thank you I’m glad, took quite a while to write!
Cara Meintjes
(@carahugomeintjes)onYes, these posts take a darn long time to write! That’s because we measure our words… because we have something meaningful to say. Thanks for this… as another Christian challenged by her atheist friends.
I thought of this post again this morning – Gareth Cliff was speaking about his Sunday school experience as a child and after several of his colleagues joined in with stories of how they bunked Sunday school or were even taken aside and told not to ask so many questions, Gareth concluded the discussion with: “We are such bad people”. They also seem to have felt judged / Bible-bashed by the church and were frankly relieved to have escaped being “brain-washed”. I hate how far away that portrayal of Christians is from everything Jesus demonstrated and I fear I am part of it. Christians are not honest enough with themselves.
Senzo Madikane
(@senzomadikane)onA lot of religious groups have a core belief of acceptance of fellow man. However, these same groups reject those that have different views and/or lifestyles. To be perfectly honest, i don’t believe in being a “atheist”. As an atheist you believe there is no God, therefore you do believe(you believe in not believing). The fact that you believe in this concept of not believing contradicts the definition of atheist which is to be a non-believer. I feel that one should rather say agnostic and then explain that they believe, but non necessary in a religion. i am a christian yet i don’t like associating myself with the christian lifestyle. This is because a lot “them” seemed to force the “way of life” down on others, this after we that it’s a choice you make to join. This constant preaching and telling those of different belief which church to go to or that the only way to live is to be christian makes me very sad. We christians end up looking like to faced monster that just wan to convert the world to one uniform lifestyle
Nicole von St Ange
(@nicolevonstange)on@Cara – Thanks! Means a lot that someone else thinks it’s meaningful, even if they believe something else :)
@Senzo – I’m going to try my best to answer this without becoming angry or sounding snotty, because to tell me that my beliefs don’t exist is… well incredibly patronising, so I’m just going to focus on why I can indeed be an atheist.
An atheist isn’t just a non-believer. It is someone who doesn’t believe in the existence of a God or gods. An agnostic is someone who believes that there may very well be a God, we just don’t know enough yet. The difference between the two is quite dramatic and to say they are one and the same is insulting to atheists and agnostics both.
Atheists = NO God,
Agnostics = Maybe God.
I don’t just not believe in religion, I believe that there is no god.
This is actually something I probably should have included in the piece since it’s quite a common misunderstanding.
Senzo Madikane
(@senzomadikane)on@Nicole – Sorry i took so long to respond. i must just apologise. i did not intend to offend you in any way. It seems to me my problem was that i only knew and accepted one obscure definition of the term Atheist and Agnostic. i am very sorry. i feel so narrow minded and that is the one thing don’t like.
Thanks Nicole for the clarity and sorry for having the wrong perception.
Geoff
(@Alumgeoff)onI wouldn’t give up hope I am a Stellenbosch Alumni and was a student between 2011 and 2014 and during that time I studied first year philosophy and then did my full degree in social sciences which provided the necessary tools to discover the flaws of faith and accept the athiest position (Which is simply the rejection of the claim that their is a god) Is the most honest and truthful position to take.
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